My stupidly long bucket list of 302 things to do before I die has a huge range of items on it that range from the weird to the pedestrian and the life threatening to the more symbolic; but one of the items I’m most keen to someday check off the list is to have a thoroughly debauched boys’ weekend away in a country other than the one I live in.
What defines ‘debauched’? Drinks, a bit of reckless stupidity, and girls of the unpaid variety. There are other sites out there with a very liberal view of sex tourism – and while I don’t feel the need to demonize it – it’s also not something I’m going to glorify on these pages.
Reading the above criteria, you’d likely find suitable nominees in most countries in the world. Hell, most states/provinces probably boast an option or two. But let’s go big or go home. Here are five places I reckon would be perfect for a debauched boys’ weekend or bachelor party.
#5 – Busan, South Korea
This one might jump out at you a little. I mean, I’d say 90% of you haven’t even heard of South Korea’s second largest city. And why would you have? In a land of unremarkable beaches, it’s not exactly a selling point to be the beach capital. It doesn’t have the western influence that makes Seoul such an accessible place for foreigners and it’s not as pretty as Hainan or as historical as cities such as Gyeonju or Daejeon.
But Busan is probably the sight of my most debauched adventures to date: my night on Texas Street. For an alternate perspective on the same night, you can also read about the adventures of Byron on Texas Street. He’s the charming lad pictured below.
What makes Busan a good location for a boys’ weekend away?
- Beaches: Sure, the beaches aren’t red-hot, but they’re beaches. Gwangalli Beach and Haeundae Beach are the city’s most well known beaches. There are noraebangs (singing rooms), amusement parks, fantastic Korean BBQ joints, and a smattering of western resaurants as well.
- The Foreigner Scene: – Busan boasts a sizable foreigner population made up largely of young, drunk teachers out to experience a little of life. With six separate night life districts (KSU, Haeundae, Gwangan/Gwangalli, Nampodong, PNU, and Seomyeon) each possessing a selection of night clubs, foreigner bars, and Korean bars – there’s rarely a night where something drunken and silly isn’t happening in Busan.Foreigners being foreigners, the westerners hanging out in Busan are always up for a late night of drinking, noraebang, BBQ, and a little Devil may care silliness. I never had as much fun (with the ladies) as I did living in Busan for five or six months.
- Hangover Soup: So good it warrants its own point. Hangover Soup (made with pork spine) is a spicy, hearty broth that never fails to burn away a hangover. Consumed post boozy night or right after you wake up, it never fails.
- Texas Street: Busan’s own den of iniquity, Texas Street is a poorly lit stretch of road lined with clubs, bars, massage parlours, cheap hotels, and the kind of establishments where a man can get up to mischief. Now while I said I didn’t endorse sex tourism, I don’t see the harm in paying a visit to a juicy girl bar where the girls flirt and kiss the clientelle in exchange for a few drinks. While I imagine you can go a bit further, I’d personally rather hit one of the aforementioned foreigner bars and live and die on my own merits.
#4 – Rio de Janeiro, Brazil
The girls, the music, the samba music, the girls… Brazil’s not capital come World Cup would be just about the most insane place to party on earth. It’d probably feel like one of the most expensive and crowded too, but when you’re drinking and celebrating life – a crowd isn’t exactly the end of the world.
A night out with the boys starts with drinks over all-you-can-eat churassco BBQ, kick on to a doubtlessly hot and sweaty club, and hopefully end with one of the legendary Brazilian beauties taking a shine to my pale, ginger-bearded ass and lowering her standards lower than her limbo record.
#3 – Amsterdam, The Netherlands
Oh, real original Chris. The city with a world famous red light district, legal marijuana, and so many backpackers that the place probably permanently bears the lingering stink of damp socks and unwashed armpits.
When in Europe, Amsterdam is one of the obvious places to go for an insane boy’s weekend – although it’s got stiff competition from Ibiza, several Greek islands, Prague, and Berlin with its beer and buxom Frauleins. Really, you could take out a dart and throw it at a map and find a good place to have a stupid adventure in Europe. Hollywood doesn’t make moves like Euro Trip, The Inbetweeners Movie, and European Vacation about the place because it’s dull.
And yes, I realize The Inbetweeners was probably not Hollywood produced. I was having a hard time thinking of movies
#2 – Bangkok, Thailand
“Holler, holler! City of squalor!”
Long before The Hangover 2 painted Bangkok as a seedy, sweaty, and insane place to party – men from Australia and around the world were flooding Thailand’s capital in search of good times on a budget.
Cheap drinks, mouthgasm inducing Thai food, nightclubs and bars custom built for stupid nights out on the town, and… well… you have seen the movie, right? Ping pong shows, lady boys making every decision just a bit risky, the bright lights and strip clubs of Soi Cowboy, and… well… I’m sure you’ll figure out the rest. I wouldn’t chance it in Thailand, but many have and many probably still will.
Me? I reckon a night of drinks, naked girls dancing, Thai food, and loud music would suffice. I don’t need to risk an STD and encourage a Thai industry built on drug addiction and poverty. But I promised not to get preachy, didn’t I?
#1 – Las Vegas
The city that puts all other party cities to shame – Las Vegas is just the balls and the cat’s pajamas (or meow, if you’d prefer) when it comes to debauched boys’ nights out. Swingers, What Happens in Vegas, The Hangover, Honey, I Blew Up the Kid… Uh, wait. Maybe not that one.
Casinos, cheap alcohol, shows ranging from plays to stand up to the more risque, strip clubs, cheap eats, expensive cars, ridiculously expensive suites, indoor fucking roller-coasters, street performance, sky diving, show girls… Need I go on?
(Please don’t answer yes; I’m running low on things)
Las Vegas is the destination for drunken silliness? Hell, I wrote an entire article about my ‘bachelor party in Las Vegas‘ dream. Go read that if you want more inspiration.
How did I do? Are there any glaring omissions?
I’ve heard Prague thrown around as a likely inclusion, but can’t figure out why. Enlighten me?