G'day! I'm Chris. I left my home in rural Australia back in 2007 to pursue a life less ordinary.
I specialize in ambitious travel - bucket list worthy journeys such as the Great US Road Trip, the ultimate African safari, and following the length of the Silk Road.
2013 was an interesting year for me. It was a year that saw me travel to two new countries, explore more of the one I call home, end a relationship, revisit some old favourites, and make the decision to have faith in myself and give myself permission to succeed in 2014. After spending the last two years of my life treading water and teaching ESL here in China, 2014 will see me take the leap of faith in my own writing ability as I head to South East Asia to focus solely on my blogging and on finishing my novel.
But before looking to the future, I thought I’d take a look back at the year that has been.
January – Thailand
The year got off to a positive start when Nomadic American and I rang in the New Year at Shanghai’s Boxing Cat Brewery with a hundred or so complete strangers. But after sharing a midnight kiss, we found the bottomless beer offer had expired and we’d have to endure a three hour wait for cabs in the freezing cold Shanghai streets. When we did finally get home, it was doubled on the back of a complete stranger’s motorbike as he raced through the darkened streets of the French concession!
January also means Spring Festival in China. While Nomadic American took advantage of her cushier schedule to spend three weeks in Malaysia, I joined her in Phuket to begin our joint South East Asian odyessy with visits to Koh Phi Phi, James Bond Island, Koh Phangan, and Koh Samui. These visits included battling food poisoning in Thailand and taking part in the world’s dodgiest eco adventure on Koh Phangan.
February – Thailand and Cambodia
February saw us continue our travels through Thailand with visits to Koh Tao, Bangkok, and Chiang Mai. We both fell head over heels in love with Chiang Mai. God willing, it’ll be my base of operations for 2014.
Here I am being utterly bad-ass with a pair of AK47s in Cambodia
We finished up our time in South East Asia with a week split between Phnom Penh and Siem Reap. I adored Cambodia as much as, if not more than, Thailand. Its warm people and beautiful temples captured my heart at the same time its more recent history broke it.
Nomadic American and I fulfill a lifelong travel dream by visiting Angkor Wat. Stunning!
Returning to bitterly cold China after our trip was a bit of a slap in the face, but we left Thailand and Cambodia with plenty of fantastic memories.
March – Shanghai
March was a fairly quiet month. We spent St. Patrick’s Day in Shanghai and spent Easter in Nanjing’s Xuanwu Lake park with a picnic to celebrate my last day in the country before returning to Australia to renew my spirits and my visa before starting a second year in China.
April – Home!
April featured three fantastic weeks back in Australia catching up with friends and loved ones. I picked up food poisoning (from dodgy Chinese of all things) on day #1 in Sydney, spent a week on a family vacation in Queensland, and finished it all off with a week of catching up with old friends in Sydney.
My brothers and I surround my adorable niece, Alchemy, while we’re on holiday in QLD.
My 2013 farewell to Australia featured new friends and some drunken staggering between Sydney bars, wizardry at Scubar, and a shiny new iPad to replace the one Nomadic American broke while we were in Thailand.
Returning to China wasn’t without its hitches – I got stuck in Hong Kong overnight, but came home to a fantastic welcome home care package and a cooked lunch from the aforementioned American. Awww!
May – Jiuzhaigou
I timed my return to China perfectly, arriving just in time for a paid week of vacation. After much arguing and second guessing as to where we should go, Heather and I eventually boarded a late flight to Chengdu where we spent a week doing some pretty fantastic stuff that I’ve yet to write about. We played with pandas in Chengdu, visited the world’s crappiest theme park (Happy Valley Chengdu), and visited arguably China’s most beautiful spot – Jiuzhaigou.
Looking buff at Jiuzhaigou
We also drank entirely too much while befriending backpackers, leading to me spending most of our final day in the city in the fetal position. Whoops!
A very hungover Aussie on the Road with the pandas in Chengdu.
June – Money!
Travel wise, June was a bit dull for me. While Nomadic American jetted off to explore Guilin and its surrounds, I stayed at home slaving away on a new freelance gig. The perk to writing an Australian Culture curriculum? I’d get paid a sweet $11,500 Australia for the work. My credit card debt would be a thing of the past, I’d be able to pay my parents back, and I’d still have some money left over for my 2014 travel plans.
July – Goodbyes
July was a tough month. After over a year together, Nomadic American and I decided to part ways. With her visa in China up, she headed off on a multi-month tour of Asia while I remained behind in China to lick my wounds and focus on myself. It was my second experience with what I like to call ‘Expiry Dating‘ and I’ve got to say, saying goodbye to a long term travel and life partner is no easier the second time around.
Sad face.
July was the month I said goodbye to my travel companion of a year, Nomadic American. Here we are at a tea ceremony in Shanghai in October 2012.
It wasn’t all doom and gloom, though. My brother, Dominik, and his girlfriend, Bronte, moved to Nanjing to start their own ESL teaching careers!
August – The Boys’ Weekends
One blessing of my newfound singularity was that I had more time to spend with my friends. Byron (of Byron and his Backpacks) and I joined forces with another young and single co-worker to embark on a pair of wonderfully fun boys weekends in August. Not at all deterred by 40+ degree days, we paid a visit to Hangzhou and its picturesque West Lake before swinging by Qingdao for its tremendously underwhelming International Beer Festival.
Byron, Hogg, and I take Hangzhou by storm.
Alas, the universe clearly couldn’t handle our bro’ings on, as Byron soon found himself shipped out of Nanjing on assignment to butt-fuck China.
September – Return to South Korea
September saw me reunited with two old loves – Nomadic American and South Korea. Two months after our break-up, Heather and I joined forces once again for a week long assault on my former home. In eight days we managed to pack in some tourist time in Seoul, a tumultuous visit to Busan, a night at the Jinju Lantern Festival, and a return to my old stomping grounds in Gwangju.
Reunited with old friends at the Jinju Lantern Festival
The trip was not without its hiccups, but all told it was a wonderful return to a place that introduced me to travel and still holds a very important place in my heart. It was also a sobering experience with the perils of time travel; how returning to a place that holds happy memories can be immensely bittersweet.
October – Joining the Nanking Nation
Travel-wise, October was all quiet on the western front for me. The only notable moment? Joining the newly formed Nanking Nation and participating in their Halloween pub crawl.
Making new friends with the Nanking Nation. Photo by Leven Smith.
In the months since, I’ve attended both NKN events including a wonderfully boozy booze cruise to ring in the New Year. My one big gripe about my time in Nanjing has always been the lame duck social scene, so finding a group of 40-60 people to go party with once a month has been great. My social circle has expanded from a dozen or so people I work or play cricket with to 30+ people who I chat with, grab dinners with, and party with.
Good times.
November – Debt Free!
November was a quiet month save for one pretty sweet piece of news – my credit card debt was gone! I’d get to celebrate my 30th birthday by checking off a bucket list item (pay off my credit card debt) and with renewed hope for 2014.
December – Christmas and New Years with Family
December was the month of family. With my brother and his girlfriend having moved to Nanjing in July, I had company for the big three in December:
My 30th
Christmas
New Year’s
My 30th birthday featured gifts, ten pin bowling, and dinner with my family and friends. After I’d dreaded the big day for quite a while, it was a wonderfully warm and pleasant way to start the next decade of my life.
Christmas in China last year meant running away to Hainan, but this year we settled in and did our level best to turn Nanjing into something resembling home. With a lot of shopping and a little help from Fields in Shanghai, we managed to have a tremendous Christmas. More on that later though.
Dom, Bronte, Dave, Byron, and I ring in the New Year in Nanjing with the Nanking Nation. Photo by Christian Piana
And how did I finish 2013? Drunk on a boat with a sixty or so of my closest friends, of course! Nanking Nation’s NYE Booze Cruise was a fittingly fun way to wrap up what had been a very up and down year for me. It had been more up than down, but I wouldn’t be too sad to say goodbye to 2013.
But more on that later as well…
Your Say
How was your 2013? What were your highlights and lowlights?
Early last year, Nomadic American and I made a trip to Thailand and Cambodia to escape the bitter cold of a Nanjing winter and soak in two cultures that I’ve long found fascinating.
As our time in Thailand came to a close, we decided to take a day long ‘adventure tour’ that would feature white water rafting, cycling, and (I’m ashamed to admit) the token elephant ride that seems to have become an integral part of any visit to South East Asia.
At the time I had some awareness of the animal cruelty that went on in Thailand, but put it at the back of my mind as I tried my best to balance experiencing Thailand without spending a small fortune in the process.
I won’t go into a detailed review of the day here, but suffice to say we both regretted our decision to partake in the elephant riding portion of our tour. As we moved slowly alongside the river atop this majestic, beautiful animal; Heather openly wept at the way the handlers seemed to take pleasure in randomly beating the elephants.
Having grown up in rural NSW, I’ve seen my fair share of animal cruelty, but even I had to flinch at the way the handlers seemed to enjoy breaking bamboo sticks over the trunk of our well behaved mount. One of them, a chain smoking, scrawny man of ancient age and mean spirit, laughed aloud every time he belted the poor creature.
It was a jarring experience. It was one thing to hear about animal cruelty and think “Oh, but that’s just a travel horror story” and another thing to see it first hand and realize that all those stories we’d read and heard about the horrendous ways in which the beautiful animals are ‘trained’ were also true.
In hindsight, we could have chosen to take part in a tour that did not feature an elephant ride and the associated cruelty. At the end of the day, though, simply choosing not to do something didn’t feel like enough.
When Jeremy of TravelFREAK contacted me about getting involved in the Travel Blogging Calendar project again and told me about the plan to raise money for the Save Elephant Foundation, I immediately jumped on board. Here was a way I could both raise awareness of the situation and make a meaningful contribution to the cause.
Unlike last year, where two dozen of us bared our supple skin for charity, this year we decided to attack things from a different angle.
How? Read on…
Save Elephants, Earn Karma, Win Big
Obviously, by raising awareness we hope that people will feel moved to donate to this fantastic charity. Doing so not only helps the cause, but gives you that warm, fuzzy feeling you get from doing something right simply because it’s what should be done.
But we’re not asking you to do that. Far from it. Instead, we’re offering donators the opportunity to win a trip to Thailand valued at $3,300! That includes a $2000 flight voucher from Flight Network and a $1,300, week long eco-friendly tour from Ian at Where Sidewalks End.
Your donation – whether $20 or $500 – buys you ‘tickets’ in the raffle and the opportunity to win this fantastic prize. If you thought seeing me staring pensively out over the Pacific Ocean was a good deal, you’re going to love this.
Look at how pensive I am!
But… it’s a Travel Blogging Calendar…
Oh, ye of little faith. Of course there’s still a calender!
Last year we put together a physical calendar and found the overhead costs + the amount of time needed to put a physical thing together and get it out to people was time consuming and meant less money we could pass on to our charity.
This year, rather than a clunky paper calendar (who uses paper these days?) we’ve gone down a different route with a digital calendar in the form of a weekly blog available only to donators.
This high tech calender doesn’t just tell you the days of the week, instead it gives you the opportunity to do a bit of travel from the comfort and safety of your desktop.
Each of our contributing bloggers has put together a short article about an interesting, fascinating, or downright strange holiday that’s taking place somewhere in the world. Accompanying this entry is a gorgeous travel shot from some exotic location – allowing you to do a little vicarious adventuring without even having to put on pants. Bonus!
I’m in! How do I donate/sign-up/enter!
I’m glad you asked! Head on over to the Travel Blogging Calendar website to sign up, donate, get your weekly calender, and get yourself in the running to win that sweet $3,300 trip to Thailand.
Take that $20 you were going to spend on a few beers or a video game from Steam or that shirt you’ve had your eye on, and invest it into a good cause, some vicarious travel, and the opportunity to win a friggin’ awesome trip to one of the most beautiful countries on earth.
You’d be crazy not to.
I can’t afford It! How can I help?
Strapped for cash and can’t afford to donate right now? There are two ways you can help this project:
Vote with your wallet: The next time you’re in Thailand or any country in which animals are being exploited, choose not to to tour with a company that encourages such cruel behavior.
Share this! Get the word out there. Share this post on Facebook or on Twitter so that others can learn more about it!
Save Elephant Foundation is a Thai non–profit organization (founded by Sangduen “Lek” Chailert ) dedicated to providing care and assistance to Thailand’s captive elephant population through a multifaceted approach involving local community outreach, rescue and rehabilitation programs, and educational ecotourism operations. Each of our flagship projects is aimed at accomplishing that mission, as well as working towards these goals:
– to expand self-sustaining eco-tourism operations that benefit local communities and ecosystems – to better incorporate our efforts into local communities – to become a leader in the field of Asian elephant research through academic outreach and education programs – to create practical, positive reinforcement based elephant training and rehabilitation programs – to establish an international volunteer community that raises awareness to issues facing the Asian elephant – to more fully integrate with the global conservation community to facilitate dynamic cross-cultural networking
2014 is shaping up as another big year of travel for the Aussie on the Road. As I look to bring to a close another chapter in my life abroad by wrapping things up here in China, that means finding a new country to call ‘home’.
On top of that, I’ve got two weddings to attend on opposite sides of the world and a few trips of my own in the works.
The Philippines
In two weeks time, I’ll be heading to the Phillipines with my brothers Leigh & Dominik, Dom’s girlfriend, and one of my good mates from work, Hogg. It’ll be my first time in the Philippines and my first holiday since my one week jaunt to South Korea last October, so I’m pretty excited.
I’ll be sunning myself on the Boracay beaches in a shade over a fortnight. Photo by Lister FilSan
I had the pleasure of traveling with my brothers (and Bronte) back in 2011 when I wrapped up my break-up tour with two extra weeks of sun, surf, and entirely too much Vonu in Fiji.
So far our plans include a week of beach bum tourism on Boracay, but beyond that it’s all pretty fluid. I’d love the chance to do some scuba diving, to see Palawan and Bohol, and to catch up with my old boss and friend, Brenden of 99 Boomerangs fame.
The United Kingdom
My next trip will be two weeks in the United Kingdom in April/May, as I’ll have the pleasure of seeing the first of my two best friends tying the knot. Dave (or Davey Gravey, as I’ll always know him) has been one of my two closest friends since he found a draft of a 17 page fantasy novella I’d accidentally left behind in a dressing room back in 1998, so it’ll be a real honour to see him marrying the equally awesome Keturah. She’s so cool that she even plays D&D with us sometimes!
Beyond being on hand for the wedding and being roughly sodomized by the UK being grossly overpriced for such a drizzly place, I’m hoping to see some of the medieval stuff that I’ve nerded out over since I was a kid. I’d also love the visit the Globe Theatre and maybe even take part in a real life zombie experience.
I’m not ashamed to admit I’m excited to see the Lakes District of the UK. Photo by Sarah Kotlova.
And with the wedding taking places in the Lakes District, I’ll finally get the chance to check out some of the things to do in the Lakes District I recommended last year.
Incidentally, I found this pretty rad comparison of London and Sydney (my former home) courtesy of Expedia.co.uk. Take a gander!
Australia
As always, Australia is going to be one of my travel destinations in 2014. It’s a rare year that I’m not home to see my friends and family, and 2014 will be no different.
My otherbest friend, Magro, is also tying the knot in 2014; and he’s done me the huge honour of asking me to be his best man. I’ve known Mags even longer than I’ve known Dave, so it’ll be a real pleasure to see him starting his next big adventure with the lovely Nicole. The bachelor party ought to be a hoot too…
While home, I’ll also take the chance to catch up with my family, remind my niece and nephew that I exist, and hopefully even do a little bit of travel.
Thailand
Perhaps the step I’m most excited about in 2014 is choosing my next country to live in. After 2.5 years in South Korea and two years here in China, it’s time to find my next expat challenge, and I can’t imagine a place I’d rather do that than Thailand.
I’m not going to lie, Thai food is pretty much reason #1 why I want to be in Thailand. Photo by Eddie Tone.
I fell in love with the country when I visited early last year, and Chiang Mai in particular captured my imagination. The opportunity to live in such a beautiful city and network with so many other fellow travel bloggers is a hard one to resist, especially when you couple that with Thailand’s low cost of living.
The plan is to not work for a while so I can focus 100% on my blog and on my novel. Obviously I’ll need money at some point, so when that need arises, I’ll fall back on my teaching.
Burma, Laos, Cambodia, Malaysia, and Singapore
While there aren’t any concrete plans yet, there’s obviously plenty of opportunities to travel to the rest of South East Asia if I base myself out of Thailand. I’d love to get to all of the above countries at some point in the next twelve months, with Burma and Malaysia being my priorities and Cambodia being a sentimental favourite.
Your Say
There you have it! A pretty big year for Aussie on the Road travel wise. What are your travel plans and ambitions for 2014?
I’m somewhat embarassed to admit that I’ve never made the trek across to Perth, but it’s long been a city in Australia I’ve had a soft spot for. Even since the rise and inglorious fall of the Western Reds, Perth’s been a place I’ve wanted to visit and, someday, live in. Nick has been kind enough to put together his thoughts on what to do on a day in Perth. Enjoy!
One Day in Perth
There is so much more to Australia than the outdated clichés of kangaroos and koala bears. One of the many perks to heading down under is the highly varied landscape, which leaves so much to explore no matter how long you spend. Even if you have just a day to spare in one of the more metropolitan cities like Perth, expect to be entertained and amazed for every minute of it.
Fun for Foodies
If you are a foodie, no trip is complete unless you have had your fill of a few of the locals’ favorite eats. Here is a way to make your meal even better – have an early breakfast at Kings Park. This scenic walk boasts stunning views of Swan River from Mount Eliza. Check out Fraser’s or Zafferano at King’s Park for good eats with great views. Zafferano offers Italian food whereas Fraser’s is the place to go if you are craving a mouthful of Australian flavors.
Arts and Culture
Do not forget the legendary variety of Australia’s flora and fauna. Each city has its own unique ecosystem as well as cultural history. To get a grasp of the city you are passing through, spend some time at the Pert Cultural Center. Learn about the biodiversity of the region as well as the history of the Aboriginal people at the WA Museum. Do not miss the Art Gallery of WA, home to Australia’s largest collection of Aboriginal art.
Ocean Views
Some people love the sight of the ocean so much they classify all vacations as either a “beach vacation” or “not a beach vacation.” If the sight of the sun’s rays reflecting over a blue horizon is enough to make you giddy, pencil in a few hours of beach time for when you go to Perth.
This is one thing Perth has in common with Southern California – the beaches to the left and the desert to the right. However, in this case, it is not the Pacific, it is the Indian Ocean. The sands are a clean white and the water is a cool crystal blue, making this one of the world’s most beautiful Oceanside destinations. If you are spending the night, splurge for a room with a waterside view. There is nothing like being lulled to sleep by the sound of gently crashing waves.
More Beach Lovin’
Those who love the good, clean thrill of adventure will find plenty to do at the beach. Pick the beach you will be spending time at according to the activity you love most. To see and be seen amongst tanned beach bodies, head to Scarborough Beach, which comes alive at night because of its many pubs and clubs. If seeing the city come alive at night gets your pulse racing, also check out the bars and restaurants at Crown Perth. If you love exploring the depths of the ocean by snorkeling, head to The Basin at Rottnest Island. This blue lagoon is famous for being home to colorful varieties of fish. Surfers have laid claim to Cottesloe and Trigg, which is known for its high quality waves.
Your Say
Have you ever been to Perth? What would you recommend somebody do if they just had the one day in Perth?
It was roughly two years ago that I put out my tongue-in-cheek and occasionally controversial Top 15 Travel Blogging Crushes.
While those on the list seemed pretty happy with the attention, more than a few shunned female bloggers took their exclusion as a slap in the face. Who knew the opinion of one bearded, portly lad from Oz meant so much?Another year has rolled around and it’s time for me to risk the wrath of the interwebs by putting together a new list of travel blogging crushes.
I cannot stress enough that the comments below are meant as light-hearted fun. While you are all doubtlessly attractive, I’m definitely not sitting here right now naked with a pump action bottle of moisturiser at hand and Barry White playing in the background. As those bloggers who have met me can attest, I’m perfectly harmless.
Of course, they said that about Jeffrey Dahmer as well…
If I do somehow forget to include you – send bikini clad pictures to cwbush@aussieontheroad.com and I’ll be sure to consider you for 2015.Enough foreplay – let’s thrust dive straight in!
Danielle’s a fellow ESL teacher. Can you say “hot for teacher?”
I was lucky enough to meet this gorgeous Scot while living in Sydney, and while she’s since broken my heart by marrying some dashingly handsome bastard, it’s okay for a guy to swoon from afar, right?A relative newcomer to the travel blogging scene, this pint sized cutie has eyes a guy could pretend to drown in hoping she’d be the one on hand to deliver mouth to mouth.
And as a proud Scot, I reckon she’d be quite adept at tossing the ol’ caber too…There’s probably a joke to be made about us having a highland fling and her checking under my kilt too, but I’m too mature for such juvenile comments.
Make your own jokes about wet t-shirts. I’m tired.
I’m not sure how the first lady of travel blogging failed to make it onto my first list, but I’m sure I’m not alone in wondering if Kate is just as adventurous behind closed doors as she is in real life. A girl who so proudly checks out ping pong shows has got to be a bit of fun, surely?
While her roguishly handsome Maltese stallion might have a thing or two to say about it, it’d be worth the risk for those dazzling eyes and the opportunity to pick the brain of one of the most successful travel bloggers out there.
Let’s be honest, as good looking as Nomadic Matt is, I’d rather not have to dress in drag and speak in falsetto to woo that particular font of knowledge.
With that cute little nose ring and a curvaceous, come hither frame, the woman behind Pack Your Passport is all kinds of cute and allegedly looking for a bearded, tattooed man to lead her around the world like in the famous series of photos.While I may not have any ink (yet), I’ve got enough beard for two men. That’s got to count for something, right? So, I’ll pack a picnic lunch and she can pack her passport, and we’ll see where things lead.
A rare couples appearance on the count-down, but I’m game if they are. As my bucket list has already revealed, I’m not above having myself a Devil’s Threeway. The Wanderlusters are experts at the house-sit, but you’ve got to wonder how much of a jump it would be to get them to move from sharing houses to sharing partners.
It took forever, but I managed to find a pic of Edna in a bikini. I knew they existed!
Edna was one of those scandalized by the fact they weren’t included on the 2011 count-down, and even went so far as to wonder if she’d have made the cut if she’d posted more bikini pics.
The short answer, of course, is yes.
But this gorgeous expat fled the humdrum of American life years ago and proved she’s a real lover of travel when living in China of all places made her an addict. That’s like becoming addicted to weed from somebody breathing it in your vicinity.
These days she’s traveling the world and looking fabulous doing it.She’s had to break off an engagement due to her traveling lifestyle, so I’m here to do my best superhero impersonation. You can call me… Rebound Guy!
Candace’s sexiness comes from her independent and adventurous spirit. What’s not to love?
This beautiful American is already engaged in one steamy affair with some lucky son of a bitch known as ‘travel’, but I’m here to suggest she could handle a second considerably Less Than Great Affair with this Aussie layabout.
She very nearly lost me when she claimed to hate Disney and cats, but her loathing of dentists and her love of Mexican food & Wes Anderson films balances things out somewhat. She’s a qualified travel writer and a talented artist, so I’ll be here Rose if she’ll be my Jack Dawson. I promise, I’ll even make room for her on the door when the boat sinks!
Larissa is an avid iPhone photographer. I wish I looked this good when I used my phone!
I cannot confirm or deny if Larissa of The Blonde Gypsy is in fact, a gypsy, but I have it from a reliable source (my mother) that our family tree includes the wandering people. So, should Larissa ever want a little gypsy in her, I’d be more than happy to oblige.
Bad pick-up lines aside, this unconventional and lovely traveler claims “follow this blog for a good time”, the kind of thing I imagine you find scrawled in a toilet stall at TBEX.
As a solo female traveler, Larissa can certainly take care of herself. That’s going to come in handy, because I’m absolutely terrified of spiders and cannot read a map.
Kyle’s less a travel blogger and more of a photographer, but I just couldn’t say no to including this beautiful shutterbug.
Her recent crossfit exploits have me convinced I’ll need to hit the gym before I’m any hope of keeping up with her, but I imagine this professional photographer could take some wicked selfies on SnapChat to inspire me to lose a few pounds.
Maybe someday I’ll be lucky enough to share a pisco sour with this Chilean firecracker while she photographs our own wedding?
This year’s man candy is that handsome Brit most recently out of South Korea. While I’m certainly in the openly gay Tom’s demographic sex-wise, I’m afraid I’m a little hairier and huskier than might be his type.
Nevermind though, I’m told I’d make one hell of a bear if I ever crossed the line, and I’d even shave my chest so the long term Korean expat and I could introduce kimchi into our foreplay.Spicy!
It’s actually proven surprisingly difficult to find a picture of Tom – an unabashed foodie – without something in his mouth. That could play in my favour, come to think of it…
I first came across this scrumptious little bit of Maui magnificence while coordinating the recent Travel Blogging Calendar. She might profess to be fluent in frolicking, but damned if I don’t want to find out if she’s also fluent in foreplay.
Those classic curves and that gorgeous face? It’s criminal that Miss October didn’t see those babies flying off the shelves like hotcakes!
The gorgeous Lainie and her handsome son, Miro. Photo courtesy of Oscar Durand.
The second participant from the Travel Blogging Calendar to rate a mention in this list, Lainie is one yummy mummy out taking on the world and breaking hearts as she goes. While I’m sure she’s got her hands more than full being a single Mum who just happens to also travel the world, everybody needs a hobby. I’m every bit as engaging as most hobbies, and considerably less messy than cooking or painting!
It’s like all of my Christmases have come at once!
Valeri recently put herself on my radar by inviting herself on my upcoming vacation, although she’s hit my shit-list by revealing she wasn’t actually serious about donning a bikini and hitting the beaches of the Philippines with me.
Still, if there are two things I’ve proven to love over the last decade or so, it’s Americans and Americans who love Australia; so Valeri’s checking both boxes.
I wonder if she’d like to be between a rock and my hard place? Come on Chris, you’re better than this!
Another Travel Blogging Calendar alumni, Jess certainly looked better rocking her scandalous scarf look than I did trying to be pensive on the California coast.
While she loses points for quoting the abomination that is Eat. Pray. Love, I’ll let it slide on account of the fact she’s an absolute stunner and she’s shown she has a heart of gold by participating in both last year’s and this year’s Travel Blogging Calendar projects.
This year she’s helping to save the elephants, and I’m not above dabbing on some grey paint and pretending if it’ll get her to help with a trunk issue I’ve been having.
Toni at my favourite beach in Oz. I wonder if she’s up for some summer lovin’?
Toni was on the previous count-down and she’s the sole returning entry this time around. Downunder and rocking the bikini like she invented it, this blonde bombshell from the UK is certainly disproving the myth that all Brits are pale and pasty.
She’s been quite open about sharing her tales of lust on the road, so I’m hoping someday our paths will cross and I can be an embarassing story she tells the lads at the site formerly known as Travel Sex Life.
With both of us also having done battle with the dreaded black dog from time to time, maybe we can forget our woes with a bit of black doggy style and some heavy petting.Ouch. Those are some bad puns.
Laurel is clearly fearless, which plays in my favour since I’m terrified of most things.
Laurel of Monkeys and Mountains clearly has a soft spot for our primate cousins, so it’s one of those rare occasions in life where my hairy body, love of bananas, and ability to manipulate rudimentary tools is likely to play into my hands.
Yes, she’s married to some German hunk and has a problem with mandatory nakedness, so that dampens my chances somewhat; but I’m willing to look past it on account of her being an adventure junkie and a social media expert.
She could feed me sliced fruit and educate me on improving my Twitter following, and I’d occasionally make monkey noises so her husband didn’t get wise.Perfect plan.
To paraphrase the late, great Michael Jackson: “It don’t matter if your black or white (or ginger) when you’re this good looking”.
It’s no secret that I’m a sucker for redheads, and this one just happens to also be right into the retro movement that I’ve always found so fascinating. A cutie who can swing dance and then break to talk travel blogging afterwards? Hold me back!
Hilary has also been awarded the title of Miss Nevada this year, so it’s not just me who finds who gorgeous and talented. With her blog getting all the more successful, maybe it’s time ‘Beauty’ met ‘The Beast’ and we started a joint blog. Aussie on the Beauty Queen has a nice ring to it, right?
I’ve included my ex here (rather than at #1) to avoid claims of bias and, besides, it’s not really a crush if you’ve already spent a year traveling with and doing unspeakably nasty things to them, is it?
This petite American with a honky tonk badonkadonk is another relatively newcomer to the travel blogging scene, but I taught her a few things in exchange for her teaching me a few things, if you know what I’m saying.
Bound for Australia next year, one can only imagine how fine she’s going to look once the Aussie sun has given her that year round tan we’re all famous for in the land downunder.
I’d like to believe Kiersten’s blog is so huge because of photos like this, but her blog is actually pretty amazing. Go check it out!
When a person’s ‘About Me’ page includes the phrase ‘former model’, they’ve got my attention. And a quick browse through Kiersten’s photo pages has more than kept my attention. While the statuesque blonde abroad wasn’t kind enough to grace the Travel Blogging Calendar with her presence, I’m hoping she’ll atone by doing a different kind of charity and deigning to mack with this bearded, portly Aussie.
I’m a sucker for a classically beautiful woman. Be still, my beating heart!
Where is Kait? I’ll tell you where she’s not: in my bed. That travesty needs to be remedied immediately!
This brunette beauty hails from Hawaii and northern California, so she loves the beach and has an even bigger love of anything coconut. Just wait until I bust out that picture of me wearing a coconut bra and grass skirt. She’ll be mine!
She’s a sucker for football (real football), loves the Aussie accent, prefers a beer and thongs to wine and high heels, and apparently makes the best grilled cheese sandwich in the world. Oh, and she’s a hopeless romantic to boot. This may have just graduated from crush to full blown love affair.
Did I mention she loves tequila too? I guess we’ll have to say if the song holds true and “tequila makes her clothes fall off”.
Sweet Lord. Is it too early to unwrap my Christmas present?
Where have you been all my life? This feisty Italian firecracker caught my eye when Facebook suggested we be friends. While the site often suggests I like Justin Bieber or Home & Away, I’m pleased to say that this time the site was dead on. If only my OK Cupid account was this accurate in its prediction of my tastes.
The woman behind Keep Calm & Travel makes it bloody hard to keep calm, as any red blooded man seeing her picture can attest. While I’ll never fully forgive Italy for the way Fabio Grosso took a dive against the Socceroos in 2006, maybe Klelia could convince me that not all Italians are so bad.
Your Say
Who are your travel blogging crushes? Are there any glaring omissions on my part?
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